Sticks and Stones: Bullying and Body Size

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Most of us absorb this cliche statement in our youth and store it somewhere in the back of our minds. But does this children's nursery rhyme paint a true picture? Do words, however hateful and discouraging, not have any affect on the way we view ourselves and others? The harsh reality is that words can sometimes be sharper than a knife, and often leave invisible wounds.

I'm almost positive everyone reading this post has come into contact with some form of bullying in their life [whether you've been on the receiving end of it, or whether you've been dishing it out.] A bully, for the specific purpose of this post, is roughly defined as an individual(s) who uses verbal force and/or verbal threats to manipulate a particular reaction or behavior out of the individual on the receiving end of the comments. While some forms of bullying are certainly more severe than others and often have greater consequences than other situations, bullying is still an issue that has been on the rise in the United States and around the world, within the past decade, regardless of the severity of each case.

WEIGHT JUST ONE MINUTE! What does body size have to do with bullying?


During high school and even during my freshman and sophomore, and junior years of college, I was on the receiving end of my fair share of unnecessary, demeaning comments, concerning both my body size and my weight. These verbal attacks were given directly and exchanged behind my back. The source of these comments were often individuals that, at the time, I considered to be friends or acquaintances. [Brings a new meaning to "behind enemy lines" doesn't it?...okay, my humor is the driest...I know].  The comments were directed toward me while I was at my heaviest, and even after dropping a significant amount of weight. I have heard everything from "Go hop on a treadmill" to "I bet he had weight loss surgery." Surprisingly [but not really] most of these insults came out of people's mouths during conversations, discussions, and debates that had nothing to do with body weight/size/health/wellness/exercise at all. In American society [generally speaking] it seems that the first place people go to throw insults is at body image...a characteristic that has always intrigued me.

Just to be clear....I am not blaming, nor will I ever blame anyone for my weight gain. That was 100% all me; however, this post is to address those verbal forms of bullying which attacked characteristics of my body at the time of each incident.

Handling the insults... was not always easy. I have rarely ever been one to show my true emotions in public, but I certainly found myself moping a lot and doing even more stress eating due to the periodic slandering. During this period, I had to re-learn and re-absorb a few lessons:

1. My exercise journey was for me, and me alone. 
2. The benefits of my journey far out-weighed any negativity thrown in my direction.
3. "You shouldn't worry when people are talking about you....it's when they're not talking, that you should worry."
4. "Anybody who has the power to change my atmosphere, has power over me."

The key to your overall success is not measured by the amount of strides that you take, or by the amount of crunches that you do, or by the amount of diets that you embark on...it is gauged by the amount of confidence you allow for yourself. If you are not confident in yourself and what you are doing to improve your healthy lifestyle, then you cannot expect others to have confidence in you. I'll leave you with this quotation:

"People are going to talk about you until the day you pass away, and there is nothing you can do about it; however, the true power lies within the dignity and strength of your response."

 As always...Peace, Love and Nutella!

Find Your Niche

We all have a routine that we like to stick to. Wake up. Brush teeth. Shower. Get dressed. Grab newspaper and coffee. Off to class/work/wherever. We know what time we like to wake up, what toothpaste we prefer, which garments to wear on a particular day, which coffee shop to caffeinate at, etc. Our routines are comprised of activities that we are comfortable with, brands we are comfortable with, and places we are comfortable with. So, why shouldn't exercise be the same?

As mentioned in my previous "Gym-timidation" post, I started out doing exercises in my dorm room. Not long after, I began to go running outside, when the weather permitted. How could I have known that nearly two years later, running would be my favorite exercise?

I'll even take it a step further...I love running so much that it is more than just an exercise for me. It's a culture...a lifestyle even. Whenever I'm feeling stressed, I know that I can just pop in my headphones, put on an awesome power-workout playlist, and zone in on my goal.

Running has taught me a lot of transferable life lessons: i.e. going the distance, endurance, sustainability, being thorough, overcoming failures, to name a few. The amount of joy it brings me is kind of geek-worthy (no shame :-) To say that I found my exercise niche in running just might be an understatement.

Sooooo....How do you find your exercise niche? 

Try as many different activities as possible! You might enjoy crunches more than running, or the treadmill more than the elliptical. You just have to get out there and try it! Once I found my comfort zone in running, I began to diversify my options. I ran on the track, in my neighborhood, around parking lots, on the treadmill, in the city, etc. The weather can make the experience fun too...if running is your thing, try going for a run in the pouring rain, or after a fresh blanket of snow has fallen!

The most important thing to do is to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Nobody knows your body, your habits, or comfort zone, like you do. You have to stand up to yourself and say "Look {insert name here}...whether I want to or not, I'm going to try this exercise today." By diversifying your options, you never know what exercise opportunities you will be exposed to; and, who knows, maybe you'll find your niche somewhere along the way!!

Peace, love, and Nutella :-)

GYM-timidation (n.) the action of feeling intimidated by the gym, or intimidating others at the gym

When I first began to incorporate cardio into my exercise plan, it was not a simple task. Timeline: Second semester of my sophomore year of college. I clearly remember walking to the gym on my particular campus, heart beating rapidly, head held low to the ground, and music blasting through my headphones. I entered the doors, the student attendant swiped my access card and I finally stepped foot into the space I had been avoiding for so long.

As expected and unfavorably anticipated, my first sight was a group of people with enormously large biceps, clanking away at the bench-press and other heavy lifting machinery. My eyes anxiously scoped out the treadmill section of the gym. Finally, I approached an empty machine. I plugged my headphones into the mp3 function on the machine, and started the treadmill. I began to slowly increase my speed from an initial walk to a trog (i.e. trot/jog). Something happened in this moment that I will never forget...I heard the sound of my own footsteps clanking against the treadmill. In MY mind I sounded so heavy, so large, so disruptive to the gym environment. I became so anxious that I thought everyone in the gym was looking at me, laughing and secretly thinking in their minds 'What is this fat guy doing in here?' Not surprisingly, I turned the machine off and ran out of the gym, back to my dorm in the Quads and cried longer and harder than I had in a while.

I'm sure a good amount of people have experienced a situation, similar to the one that I described above. (Maybe not to the same extreme, but similar, nonetheless.)

Lessons that I learned from my particular situation:

1. No one was looking at me/paying attention to me while on the treadmill.
2. No one was actually laughing at me.
3. The mind is a POWERFUL thing.
4. From experience, most people who go to the gym are focused on themselves and not anybody else.

So, what did I do after I finished crying and feeling sorry for myself?- After many tissues and a much needed, up-lifting pep-talk from my roommate, I sat down at my computer and developed an exercise table on Word. This included different forms of exercise, such as pushups, sit-ups, crunches, dancing, etc. (Yes! even dancing!) 

As for the running? - Fortunately Spring was approaching, and the weather was beginning to warm up. Yes...in order to step my running game up, I began to run outside on a sidewalk trail outside of my dormitory in the Quads. The area had virtually no people traffic at any time of the day, and it was peaceful. For myself, that was what I needed....PEACE.

As I began to develop confidence in myself by running outside, coupled with my other dorm exercises, I realized that I did not necessarily need a gym to achieve my goals at that particular time in my journey!

Respect Yourself: Past and Present

I believe most of you have heard the statement, "You can't know where you're going, unless you know where you've been." I'm sure this is probably a recycled quotation that has been translated in many different ways, across multiple cultures. I certainly believe and consistently remind myself to not only acknowledge the past, but also to respect it.

Reasons to RESPECT your past health choices:

1. In case you may have forgotten- We're ALL human!

• We often spend too much time comparing our past choices with others; yet, we also seem to forget the common denominator: that we're human. 

2. Your past health choices make up who you are today.

• whatever your health choices were, up until this present point , have made you what you are today.
1. You can either acknowledge those choices and be content with them -or-
2.  You can waste precious time degrading yourself for those past decisions
• What's the common denominator here? (All of those choices are in the past, and there is nothing you can do to change them! You can only move forward!!!)

3. If you respect the person that you are today, then you have no choice but to respect the decisions that brought you here, as well as the lessons you learned along the way.

• Personally, I am not proud of every time I binge ate junk food, went back for seconds and thirds, or tossed 2.5 servings of soda down my throat in one sitting, but along the way I learned some valuable lessons and educated myself on subjects such as (portion size, portion control, carbohydrates, proteins, potassium, blood pressure, etc.)
• I could not be the educated person I am today, without having experienced these situations first-hand.

4. When you respect the past you ultimately learn one of the greatest lessons of all: YOU'RE STILL THE ONE AND ONLY YOU!!!

• This reason is very special to me, because I realize that whether I am a 272 lb. Forrest or a 170lb. Forrest, at the end of the day I am STILL Forrest!
• This will also make you realize that you are capable of and adaptable to change and transformation; you begin to recognize that you are capable of so many things that you never thought you were capable of before. 

I'll leave you with a quotation (of which I'm unable to locate the definite origin):

"You cannot expect others to respect you, if they see that you don't even respect yourself." 

Everyday, I confidently walk out of my door armed with the knowledge and lessons of my past, knowing that my present state is a result of my ever-constant journey of positivity, and realizing that my future is limitless. With a little education, acknowledgement and respect of those past choices, you will be on your way to an abundance of future, positive and healthy choices!!

Peace, love and Nutella!

-Forrest

The Scale: Friend or Foe?

Many of you may be wondering how I came up with the title of this blog, "How to Lose a Scale in Ten Weighs." It obviously may remind you of the similarly entitled, hit movie starring Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson. In fact I developed my title while watching this movie.

Some of you may also be asking yourselves, 'Why would Forrest want to lose a scale?' Well, in the early stages of my weight loss journey, I became obsessed with the numbers on the scale, rather than focusing on my goals for a healthy lifestyle as a whole. At the beginning of my journey, it did not take long for me to notice the numbers dropping on the scale...in fact, it seemed almost too easy when I finally got into the swing of things. The reality was that the initial weight to come off of my body was moisture, due to water retention. Anything from water weight to perspiration weight added to my success. Instead of each workout being an integral part of a larger workout plan, my weekly exercises became an excuse for me to hop on the scale EVERYDAY, with the expectation that some type of miraculous weight loss had taken place.

Ladies, gentlemen, aliens (once again, excuse my dry humor), and everyone else in between: do not create false expectations for yourself!! Just because you do a particular exercise one day, does not mean you'll necessarily see results immediately. You may not see any physical changes or changes in the numbers on the scale immediately, but be rest assured that changes are taking place. The most important task is to maintain a positive attitude and environment for you to achieve your specific, positive results.

Hello again! I've been contemplating all day as to what my first piece should be; and, I thought, 'What better way to start off than giving you perspective on my background.' So, without further ado....here I am!

Now, you can actually put a face to the name. Turns out I'm not a group of trees after all (don't mind my dry humor)! I'm a senior at Rutgers University (and proud of it!) I study the fields of Human Resource Management and Labor Studies and Employment Relations. Like every other college senior graduating in May, I'm rigorously searching for full-time jobs and browsing grad school opportunities, so if anyone out there reading this has any opps, let me know!

When I graduated high school  I weighed in at 230 lbs. I played football freshman and sophomore year of high school, took a bit of a rest and, picked up varsity weightlifting from the second half of junior year until I graduated. (Now to dispel a rumor: Weightlifting, for me did not make me buff or anything, it simply made my legs stronger. I really did not get into any good, physical shape, because I wasn't implementing any other healthy measures in my life.)

Let's fast-forward a bit: February 2011 (second semester of freshman year at Rutgers, I weighed in at an astonishing and unhealthy 272 pounds at 18 years old.

I had no idea at the time what an interesting journey I was about to embark on...a life-changing journey that I am still traveling and exploring today!

Welcome to How To Lose A Scale In Ten Weighs!

Hey y'all! Forrest here. I've been tossing the idea of starting a blog around for the past year and a half, and I finally mustered up enough concentration to sit down and do it. That being said, THANK YOU, for visiting my blog!! Your views are/will always be appreciated!

Just a run down of a few things about this blog: It will mainly be a place, environment, resource for those who want to learn about my method of getting myself into shape, and how living a healthy lifestyle benefits mind, body, and soul. This blog will be a place where all opinions will be respected. Offensive, discriminatory, prejudice or excluding material will NEVER be posted. It is my goal to offer a perspective on my journey of living a healthy lifestyle, while respecting the positions, comments, and input of others.

Once again, thank you for tuning in and I cannot wait to start this journey with y'all. So....without further procrastination....LET'S GET BLOGGING!!!!!!